‘Twas the Night Before Black Friday

This year we are poised to spend even less time with our families with shops opening as early as 6 pm the day before Black Friday or, as some of us like to call it Thanksgiving. We decided to have a little fun with a holiday classic and remind everyone that fighting over sales at 2 am isn’t our only option during the holidays.

Check out this poem, written by former Sideqik employee Jessica Muñoz:

Twas the night before Black Friday when all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
The plates were laid on the table with care,
In hopes that dinner guests soon would be there.

The children were nestled all snug in their coats,
With dreams of getting a toy scribbled in their notes.
And mama in her Ugg boots and I in my North Face,
Had just settled our lawn chairs to save our earned place.

When out in the parking lot arose such a clatter,
Though no one sprang from their chairs to see what was the matter.
Away in the distance we saw cop car lights flash,
Breaking up a fight for a little-saved cash.

The moon on the cover of the new Black Friday flyer,
Gave hope to the people they will be the lucky buyer.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a store employee with eight crazy shoppers near.

“Single file in order! No stomping! No yelling and punching!
No name calling! No running! No pushing and shoving!
To the back of the electronics, to the toy sales wall!
Don’t tear apart, rip apart, pull apart anything at all!”

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, they ignore it to buy.
So up to the counter the customers they flew,
With the cart full of Toys, and flat screen TVs too.

And then, in a crackling, I heard on the speakers,
The announcing of 3DS bundles for super savings seekers.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the aisle a giant mob came with a bound.

They were covered all in sweat, from their head to their feet,
And their clothes were all tarnished with coffee and smoked meat.
A bundle of cool sales they had flung in their buggies,
For their close family, friends, and of course their sweet hubbies.

Their eyes-how they twinkled! Their brows all furled!
Their cheeks were like roses, their fist all curled!
They sprint to the counter to seek what their prize is,
Only to find the man in front claimed the last one as his.

The roar of the crowd made such an impression,
It made me realize consumer obsession.
The holiday season has changed so drastically,
Families now skip Thanksgiving enthusiastically.

When did a night for family take such a turn,
And when did everyone show such a lack of concern?
For the retail workers forced to work overnight,
So others may slightly benefit from their plight.

I speak not as an activist, but more as a person,
In fear that the holiday season may worsen.
Why battle the crowds for discounted housewares,
When you can save on Cyber Monday while still in your desk chairs.

This year we ask you to ignore the holiday malign,
To save the poor workers and do your shopping online,
So you and I can say honestly and with delight,
Happy Thanksgiving to all, and to all a good-night!


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